Regrets I have a few but then again – too few to mention!

It’s that time of year again when we tend to look back and reflect on what’s gone before – the achievements, disappointments, successes and of course regrets.  Two incidents happened to me this last week that have made me ponder on this more.  One was in a work context and the other at home, both something silly I did, which has left that niggling feeling of regret.  How can I still be struggling with this?  What is it that allows me to sabotage myself?

I’ve been struck by the realisation that many of us are way too hard on ourselves.  Not only do we do something silly or worse that we regret, but we then make it 10 times more painful by the guilt and harshness we put on ourselves….why is this?  Maybe we like to feel bad about things and worry some more?  Let’s face it what would we do if we didn’t have things to worry about!  Or is it that we have such high expectations on ourselves (instilled by others, or ourselves?!) that means we have this perfect standard to live up to….and we’ll never be ‘good enough’, I also feel sometimes that I’m in danger of falling into that camp of people who don’t give a monkeys about what they do and how they affect others – so to overcompensate let’s put more pressure on ourselves to be super human.

The art of being able to see when you do things you’d rather you hadn’t, accept it and then shake it off is an amazing gift.  This allows us to take responsibility for our actions but also to treat ourselves with kindness and allow ourselves to be human.  So as I look back on 2009 I’m going to give myself a break, acknowledge what I’ve achieved and who I’m becoming (good and bad!) and let it be.

Regrets I have a few but then again – too few to mention!