National Marriage Week 2010
Today is my wedding anniversary – 12 years of wedded bliss…hmmm well 12 years of a variety of emotions – love, fun, joy, frustration, disappointment, anger, perseverance, commitment, compromise, laughter, companionship, tears, struggles – all a mix of highs and lows – life you say! Yes it is life whether married, single, divorced or widowed life is full of ups and downs, taking the rough with the smooth and appreciating all the good things about each status of life is the key.
It’s National Marriage week this week and according to studies Marriage remains incredibly popular – over 90% of young people in the UK aspire to be married at some point in the future, and the large majority will achieve this. Although the popular view is that marriages don’t last, two out of every three first marriages will last until one partner dies, and one in two second or subsequent will also last a lifetime. The Divorce rate (the number of divorces per 1000 married couples) has remained virtually static since the early 1980’s.
This has made me reflect on this thing called marriage and what an impact it can have on us. I know many people who’ve had the misfortune to experience difficult marriages, whether their own or their parents. BUT my experience with my parents was one to be admired.
It would also be my Dad’s birthday today if he was alive – 69 years old, no age really but in that time he had 45 wonderful years of marriage to my Mum. Not perfect maybe at times but always together. There was such companionship between them – they loved being together and hated being apart, especially my Dad from my Mum. I will always remember their example and their lives together and only hope my marriage will have such a positive impact on my kids.
I have also noticed over the years how we always want what we don’t have. When I was single I longed to find ‘that’ person – the one I’d spend my life with, then when I got married there were many times I’d look back and want to be single – to be able to make decisions just for me and do whatever I wanted! Then the desire for kids came along and again desperate yearning for a child and now three kids later there are many times I look forward to being on my own and having only the responsibility for myself! So what’s the point of all this – THE GRASS IS NEVER GREENER and if it is it’s only short term – that grass eventually turns brown as well.
Make the most of your life right now – appreciate what you have and let them know….this may be a bit cheesy but a friend of mine wrote this many years ago and I’ve always remembered it…
As a lake with no outlet grows stagnant
So a heart with no flow won’t run clean
If feelings and thoughts are never expressed
They block up the mind too with fear
Expressions of these are important to keep hold of those you hold dear
If you never say how you feel towards them
It’s certain that they’ll never hear
