The Stress Cliff...

Many people talk about being stressed these days – seems the in response to how are you?  “bit stressed” BUT are we really and if we know we are what are we doing about it?  Why do we seem to want to live in a constant state of stress?  Is it sympathy, martyrdom, a sense of pride at being in demand? – if our response was –“very chilled thanks”, or “very content right now” how different would our conversations be?

Of course stress is a real emotion and can be devastating.  Many years ago I spent time studying this and living with the impact of stress, burnout, and breakdown.  I came to the conclusion that stress in its smallest sense is healthy and we need it – I liken the three stages to walking along the edge of a cliff.  Stress is that feeling of seeing the edge, feeling the wind on your face, seeing the amazing view but standing on solid ground.  There is an aliveness about it, exciting and it keeps you moving.

Burnout however is when you’ve sat down on the top of that cliff.  You are exhausted, can still see the amazing view and feel the wind on your face but the sensation of being so close to the edge is frightening.  One little tilt forward and you may be over.  There’s still the ground that you’re sitting on but the fall is closer.

Breakdown to me is when you’ve tilted too far over the edge, you’re fallen off the cliff and it feels like it may never end.  This is dangerous territory and can have serious impact.

The thing is in all these stages you can see what’s happening – you can see the edge, the fall, the view but in the first stage you have more control over how close you get.  You can always move away as you see the edge approaching.  Of course this metaphor may seem trite and I don’t mean to be.  I know you can’t see it coming sometimes and people suffer in these three stages.  BUT for most of us the first stage is where we are at in our busy lives.  We can feel the adrenalin of pressure, responsibility and deadlines but we also have the control to make sure we don’t sit down on the edge or indeed tip over.

I heard someone talk recently about wide open spaces, being in a place of space – whatever that means for us.  Many times we feel closed in, claustrophobic and that we have no choice in our lives.

To be able to see the edge we need to spend some time in the wide open spaces – find what they are for you and spend time there.  They will be different for us all BUT they are there.  What refreshes you?  What must you have in your life to stay on the cliff, admiring the view? And for those who feel they may have sat down or even tipped over – reach out and get help…we all need support.