I read an article a while ago in Psychologies magazine where one comment has stuck with me. It was an interview with Helena Bonham Carter and the question she was asked was – “Does over-thinking things sometimes get in the way of trusting your instincts?”
Her reply quoted a book called Blink by Malcolm Gladwell – he looks at what happens in that blink of an eye moment – those few seconds when you first meet someone or think about something.
Helena’s response was – “in the moment of a blink you know the right thing to do. A lot of indecision is not because you don’t know what to do, it’s because you don’t want to do it!”
I’ve been in a time of making decisions for the last few months and am in danger of over-thinking. When things don’t seem to fall into a perfect jigsaw puzzle and the pieces all match – the decision gets blurred and doubt creeps in. So this week I’d like to draw this concept to your mind. If you’re in a time of change please take what you will from this, and know that you can trust your gut instincts.
I do believe there are other things that stop us going with our gut – not just that we may not want to do the thing we know is right. Also we may be swayed heavily by external pressures; our partners, boss, friends, parents, society. We may want to go and do that worth while job that pays little, but the pressure of ‘the norm’ stops us – even at times when money is not a problem.
Also there’s our own personality and tendency towards action or inaction. Some of us love to procrastinate and know what we must do but are afraid to do it. There’s that amazing quote by Marianne Williamson that says it’s our light that frightens us more than our dark – what if we did step out and really go for something big – what could be possible?!
For those of you who do love to over think here’s an extract from the Blink book to get you thinking more about not thinking so much!
‘One of the stories I tell in “Blink” is about the Emergency Room doctors at Cook County Hospital in Chicago. That’s the big public hospital in Chicago, and a few years ago they changed the way they diagnosed heart attacks. They instructed their doctors to gather less information on their patients: they encouraged them to zero in on just a few critical pieces of information about patients suffering from chest pain–like blood pressure and the ECG–while ignoring everything else, like the patient’s age and weight and medical history. And what happened? Cook County is now one of the best places in the United States at diagnosing chest pain’. Malcolm Gladwell.
For others of us it’s our lack of self confidence and belief that makes us stumble. Surely so and so knows better than me, I must seek out confirmation from everyone I know and get a consensus before I decide….sound familiar?
I want to encourage you today – you are the one that has to live your life! Sure, others are affected and impacted by those choices, but at the end of the day you are the only one actually living your life. Of course I’m not saying we ditch any sense of reason on a whim, but if you check out your gut instincts I’d bet they are not mad, wacky ideas. They may say things like – “this friendship is not healthy for me”, ” this direction I’m on will not end well”, “this pattern of behaviour and thinking I have is not helping me or anyone around me”, “this job is not suited to me, I could be doing something so much more worth while with my life”.
So for me I’m going to go with my gut more. When I have in the past it’s always proved valuable. AND remember if you need help find those around you who will encourage you to find your path – not to walk theirs!
Tags: Decisions, Inaction, Self confidence
